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Thursday, June 19, 2014

Packing list

Here are some things you will need for your vacation to the Outer Banks: a camel, a grappling hook, counter-weights, pitons, crampons, axe, rope, porta-potty and a telescope.

The camel is for traveling over the dunes from your house to the beach, which, even if you are "oceanfront," is a third of a mile away over dunes far too high and deep to see over. The telescope is for seeing the beach from your house. The top of your house, by which I mean, a platform over the roof. The rest is climbing equipment that will permit you to follow or lead your camel over the dunes. You cannot ride the camel because it will be carrying your porta potty.

Here is our oceanfront vacation rental, the Sandpiper:

Note proximity and number of nearby houses. It's cute, isn't it? It was very comfortable inside. It was very inconvenient outside.  See the roof platform? You have to climb up there, four levels up from the ground, if you wish to see the ocean.
The ocean:

It's that narrow grey band in the middle. See? Pays to have a telescope. We didn't have one, so we just squinted.

Note in the top picture how the house seems to be sitting on the ground. It's not, the bottom level is the garage. Try taking three dogs up and down the stairs six times a day. Want great legs? That's one way to do it. Another, probably, is climbing the dunes a couple times a day, which I might have done had I not been worn out from walking the dogs!


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